Cut to the Heart

I know what you're thinking. This has to do about love, doesn't it? Well, no, not entirely. Last sunday my pastor says spiritual growth and true healing comes when we are cut to the heart. That means we come to realize we are not in control, not when it comes to the big picture. This leaves an unsettling feeling equivalent to 'helplessness'. In order to fill the cracks we already blame our creator for, we turn to any number of bad behaviors. So, the cut that we felt initially is now a gaping hole as we literally pierce our God in the back. But heres the thing. In that moment, he smiles. Jesus says, its ok, I take your yoke upon my back in the form of the cross and forgive you. And when that moment comes where all becomes clear, like the end of a foggy day, we realize everything we had gone through, and the hardships we faced, were to prepare us for the next chapter. And the things that once filled our souls with dread and anxiety become resolved, sometimes not to our liking, but in a way that will make sense in the bigger picture. I'm talking an entire generation. God is so awesome he has already carefully designated who would say what to whom at the right times in a way that brings glory to his kingdom within a generational timespan----and that's all with the influence of the sin!

While we're on the topic of sin, can we be real again?

I've come to the conclusion that, though everyone struggles with a sinful shell within this mortal coil, we all have 2 or 3 deadly sins from which most of our negative behavioral patterns stem from. Like a sinful petri dish where all this behavior bacteria just accumulates over time. So my prime deadly sins, for example, are Envy and Pride. The Envy in me makes me territorial and jealous easy, so the Lord is helping me overcome that by learning to trust the ones I love. When it comes to being jealous of friends or family, its really just because I feel if they are already this far in their lives, where does that leave me? This is where Pride takes over and says, 'if you don't get as far as them, they'll end up forgetting about you'. Obviously a lie, but in the moment, its believable. So I push myself as hard as I can to become someone, anyone at this point. That's where pride works its way in your brain and now, that becomes your purpose, to rise above. Nothing wrong with that at first, until you realize its become your idol. Soon, church and the Word takes a backseat before its thrown out all together. You make it to that place you want to be, but now that pride has a firm hold on you, other deadly sins will follow. Maybe greed? You like the idea of surpassing people and make it a new thing? Or you use the money you now have (and once didn't care much about outside survival and occasional trips) and indulge in the finer (or maybe not so finer) things. And once all 7 deadly sins worm their way into your heart, you better wake up and reach out because you're *ahem* playing with fire. Heh. So yeah. Tricky stuff.

Ok that about wraps it up for tonight. Sorry if this one is a bit long. If you liked it, let me know int he comment section :)